Introduction to “Crazy Talk” by Yuan Xiaoyi
Meeting this pair of sisters truly opened his eyes. Sissi loves to exercise, a modern girl with a great figure. Mimi dresses in ancient style, a person with a terrible memory, mimicking an ancient lady. Under their “tyranny,” he felt less and less like a man, But for the sake of “field observation,” he endured it without complaint. The various species of humans and animals made them look stunned. Difficult circumstances brought them closer together, “Sharing the same bath” and “sleeping in the same bed” became habits, It was not easy for him to understand these emotions, Yet, he couldn’t grasp whether he could continue to have her after “returning to the future.”
At the end of a road somewhere on Zhongyong Mountain, there was a small thatched cottage. In front of the cottage were two small vegetable gardens, and behind was an open space with a large water tank standing. It was said that this small thatched cottage belonged to two girls, the sisters Sissi and Mimi. Sissi’s real name was Xu Yue’en, and her sister was Xu Huanqi. Although their living place was somewhat remote, they got along well with their “neighbors” at the foot of the mountain.
All this began on this day. At five in the morning, Xu Yue’en, rubbing her eyes, silently walked out of the small house, silently resenting the unchanging truth from ancient times to the present—why do martial artists have to get up so early? Her childhood ambition was to become a highly skilled female martial artist, not for some grand purpose like saving the weak, but simply because she wanted to be as “cool” as the female characters in movies. In fact, she knew that the light kung fu in movies was all done with wires and special effects, but she believed that as long as she kept “practicing,” one day she could achieve the light-footedness of flying over grass! Tying small weights to each leg, Xu Yue’en began her daily morning routine—jogging. Suddenly, there was a soft “hee-hee” sound from behind. Xu Yue’en turned to look. “Are you going to ‘practice’ again?” Xu Huanqi asked with a light chuckle. Heaven knows, what this old-fashioned sister called “practicing” was nothing more than jogging. “What time did you go to bed last night?” Xu Yue’en raised an eyebrow at her sister, who was indeed strange, staying up late reading ancient books, who knows if there was anything good to read! “I just fell asleep… maybe left or right,” Xu Huanqi said, chuckling again, “The ‘Shan Hai Jing’ is an interesting book, once you start, you can’t stop.”
These two sisters were quite the odd pair; one was extremely fond of exercise, always dragging a couple of heavy dumbbells around everywhere; the other loved reading books, but her memory was poor, and when asked what she had read or how she felt about the books, she could remember nothing.
“Really can’t see what’s so interesting about it,” Xu Xian’en raised her eyes, pointing coldly at her sister. “Your underwear is showing.”
Xu Xianqi looked down at her exposed underwear and disheveled clothes, then burst into laughter. “Oh my, why are you looking so closely? Besides, it’s just us here, who’s going to steal a glance?”
Xu Xianqi’s old-fashioned way of speaking almost drove Xu Xian’en, a modern woman, mad. Unlike her sister, Xu Xianqi, although she aspired to be a lady, was fully aware that she lived in modern times; however, her sister spoke in an archaic manner, wore ancient attire daily, and even mixed styles from different eras.
“I’m not going to argue with you anymore. You better go catch up on some sleep,” Xu Xian’en waved her hand, turned, and ran off.
The path was filled with lush greenery, and a cool breeze passed by her ears, but Xu Xian’en felt no chill, just continuing her recent workout.
However, the unexpected always happens when people are doing something exemplary.
Weird… Xu Xian’en felt a bit doubtful as she squinted her eyes, wondering why she saw a “group” of something wriggling on the ground in front of her. Should be people, right?
She quickened her pace towards the pale shadow. It was indeed a person, and a tall man at that.
His soft black hair covered his forehead, his pale face was somewhat too white, and his slender body was limp…
Suddenly, Xu Xian’en had a thought: Had he starved to death?
She tentatively reached out her hand towards his nose… An indescribable mix of excitement and fear welled up inside her; she… she had never seen a dead person before…
After confirming he was still breathing, Xu Xian’en breathed a sigh of relief, but the area was sparsely populated. If he didn’t wake up, would she have to carry him home by herself?
As a modern woman, she couldn’t just abandon a frail, helpless man; that would go against her sense of chivalry! Moreover… looking at his pale face, his weak body… how could she be so heartless as to leave a high school boy by the roadside?
Regardless of his fragility, she should help him, considering she was older than him, right?
A sense of chivalry and compassion surged from all directions, completely overwhelming her initial thought of abandoning him. Xu Xian’en silently shook him.
“Hey, little brother? Little brother?” She watched him with a hint of hope, wishing he would open his eyes, so she wouldn’t have to carry a “corpse” back home.
Alas, his long, delicate eyelashes remained motionless.
With a resigned sigh, Xu Xian’en decided she might as well carry him back.
“Oh well… this can count as exercise too.”
In contrast, Xu Xianqi lacked this softness and chivalry. At this moment, she was frowning, her red lips biting on her clothes, watching the man draped over her sister’s back.
“Qi, go help me fetch some water.” Xu Xian’en tried his best to suppress the urge to throw the heavy object on his back onto the bed, his forehead covered in sweat as he instructed.
“Alright, A’fu.” She lightly stepped away with small, delicate steps, off to handle her aunt’s errands.
She laid him on the bed, not expecting that this high school boy, who looked thin, was actually quite heavy. Luckily, she regularly exercised, and her strength had gradually improved; otherwise, she wouldn’t have been able to handle the weight of this high school boy. Xu Xian’en exhaled heavily.
“Aunt, the water is here.” Xu Xian’qi returned lightly, holding a wooden basin with her delicate hands, a towel draped over the bed to cover the boy. “Aunt, who is he?”
“A stranger.” Xu Xian’en, with hands and feet fumbling, helped the high school boy wipe his face and hands. “It’s almost seven; I need to get ready for work. You’d better keep a close eye on him, not missing a single hair.”
Hearing her aunt’s instructions, Xu Xian’qi’s eyes widened with a lively expression, her finger playfully pointing at her own aunt. “Men and women should not be too close… Aunt, are you so cruel to leave me alone with an unknown man?”
Xu Xian’en looked at her niece with some impatience, “Who told you to stay home doing nothing? If not, you can go down the mountain to work, and I’ll take care of him. What do you think, niece?”
“No… no… no…” Xu Xian’qi stammered several times, her face turning pale.
She hadn’t expected her aunt to be so terrifying, not only leaving her alone with a man but also planning for her to go out and work, exposing her face?
“Then he’s in your care now?”
“He’s… a man…” Xu Xian’qi wrinkled her nose, showing a look of disdain.
Xu Xian’en straightened up and narrowed her eyes, “Want to try your aunt’s roundhouse kick?”
Xu Xian’qi stepped back silently, shaking her head in panic.
Although her aunt usually practiced martial arts chaotically, in her niece’s eyes, she had no martial arts talent at all. However, after years of practice, this woman had indeed gained considerable strength…
