After a couple of steps, Jing Haobo hugged my leg tightly. Annoyed, I tried to kick him off, but couldn’t shake him loose. He was now crying out in desperation: “Shuang’er, Shuang’er, are you going to leave me again? Don’t be angry, okay? I didn’t mean to! I broke my promise. Will you take me away? I’ll forget, I promise!”
My heart ached upon hearing this. Had he hesitated to get close because of guilt towards his deceased lover? Was his attachment to a lost love causing this refined gentleman to break down?
I crouched down and turned his face towards me: “Look and see who I am.”
His hair was tangled, and his face covered in dust. He looked at me foolishly, his lips moving: “Shuang’er… why don’t you recognize me… you’re not Shuang’er. You’re Hua Xiaoxin… you are Hua Xiaoxin!” His voice rose to an almost feminine pitch at the end.
“Do you like me?
I looked at him softly. If he just nodded, this nightmare would end. Seeing him like this, my heart was conflicted. I liked his clean and gentle manner, the image of him playing the flute in the wind. That sense of peace was unique.
Jing Haobo gave a bitter smile, releasing his grip on my leg and falling back, staring at the dark ceiling. My heart sank with him.
I had been angry that he clung to a promise to a dead person, reluctant to acknowledge his feelings. Now, after finally speaking his heart and giving me hope, he faltered!
Time eroded my hope until it felt submerged, and he finally whispered: “I love you, very much.” Then he got up and staggered towards the inn’s door.
Watching his stubborn figure, my eyes welled up. Objectively, he was a good man—handsome, scholarly, talented, gentle-hearted, loyal in love. But was he destined for misery, unable to accept new love because of his past?
No, it shouldn’t be like this! I don’t want this!
I shouted at his back: “I love you too!”
I saw him shake but he didn’t turn back. He rushed out the door.
I smiled bitterly. Was this the end?
A loud bang startled everyone in the room.
