He stepped to leave again, but Ruan Ning immediately hugged him once more, pressing her cheek against his back: “A Mo, I was wrong. Don’t go…”
Unable to see his face, she only heard his lonely heartbeat. Tears welled up; she had truly made a mistake and shouldn’t have hurt him.
“What did he want you to do?” Yan Xuan’s voice was cold.
“The map of your palace,” Ruan Ning spoke incoherently, “I don’t know what he wanted to find.”
Yan Xuan suddenly turned, gripping her throat with cruel eyes: “I’ve already told him no women are allowed in the palace.”
A tear fell on his hand, followed by others. As clarity returned to his eyes, he removed his hand from her neck, hesitantly embracing her waist, and said in a hoarse voice: “It’s me.”
Ruan Ning burst into uncontrollable sobs.
Yan Xuan bit his lip and picked her up, rustling to find the bruise-healing ointment. He placed her on his lap and carefully applied it to her neck, where two finger marks remained from when he had first laid hands on her. Though he tried his best to resist, he had still given him an opportunity.
“I’m sorry,” Yan Xuan murmured, not daring to look into her eyes. He had never despised himself as much as he did now. He was a madman, a murderer, with an unspeakable past and an uncontrollable self. He had wanted to protect her but had still hurt her because of his unwillingness and jealousy.
“I’m sorry,” Ruan Ning said, turning her face away as tears fell. “It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have hidden things from you. I won’t do this again.”
Yan Xuan was stunned but finally dared to face her. Her tear-streaked face was more real than ever. Even if she was just temporarily placating him, he would accept it.
Yan Xuan kissed Ruan Ning, starting gently before it turned into fervent passion, almost drawing away her breath. Ruan Ning fell weakly into his arms, allowing him to kiss and caress her as his desire swept over everything.
After a long time, Yan Xuan reluctantly released her lips, kissing the tears on her cheeks. The taste was slightly salty and bitter, yet it resonated deeply in his heart.
