The person by the bed didn’t disappear this time; instead, he let out a low laugh, sighed softly, gently turned her body back, then with one hand shielding her eyes and the other turning on the light, the room brightened. Fu Xiaotang blinked, closed her eyes, and when she opened them again, she saw the familiar hand blocking the harsh light. She hugged the hand, pulling it down, revealing Fang Junjie’s face, smiling gently, his eyes bright with a mix of regret, self-reproach, and a touch of understanding joy and emotion.
The two just looked at each other, saying nothing, until tears slowly welled up in Fu Xiaotang’s eyes, rolling down her cheeks and falling onto the bed. Fang Junjie sighed almost imperceptibly, cupping her face with his hands and gently wiping away her tears. In a low, almost threatening voice, he said, “I’ve always been one to stick to my word, and the only time I’ve ever respected public opinion seems to have been in vain. From now on, I’ll revert to my autocratic ways. Whether you agree or not, you must, and you can only have eyes for me. If you dare to be distracted by someone else again, I…” He suddenly stopped, looked at her intently for a while, then leaned down almost reverently to kiss her eyelids before burying his face into Fu Xiaotang’s neck, whispering into her ear, “I’m sorry, forgive me!” Overcome with emotion, Fu Xiaotang tightly embraced his neck, tears streaming uncontrollably.
Fu Xiaotang moved further into the bed, making space for Fang Junjie to sit beside her. Their hands intertwined, half-leaning against the headboard, with only a small lamp casting a warm, dim light over their faces, making them look gentle and blurred. Fang Junjie’s voice was soft and clear, like a stream flowing under moonlight, unhurried as he began, “When I first saw you, I never imagined that this quirky-haired little girl would become an indispensable part of my life later on. It wasn’t until I got drunk once, in my hazy state, I knew someone was fussing over me, taking care of me with such tenderness and attention. When I woke up in the middle of the night, aside from a slight emptiness in my head, I felt surprisingly warm and comfortable. Then I saw you, curled up in front of the sofa, hugging your knees, sleeping so peacefully. When I picked you up, I was inexplicably stunned; your body felt so light. I couldn’t help but feel a protective affection towards you. And you know, when I got to the bedroom, I was reluctant to put you down, as if you belonged in my arms. Later, when I learned about your entanglement with the sons of the Song and Xin families, I suggested pushing you to be the number one at Heaven on Earth. By then, I already had feelings for you, though I couldn’t say why, nor did I bother to analyze it. I just knew I was eager, even yearning to see you, with a strong desire to get to know you better. I had a vague sense that the closer I got to you, the more inseparable I would become, and I was thrilled by that thought. When I waited for you at the Fang family’s old mansion, standing in the entrance hall, watching you walk towards me in a cheongsam under the glow of the setting sun, I was truly mesmerized, speechless for a long while, then overwhelmed with joy. I even arrogantly thought that perhaps all the steps you had taken before were leading you to me, that all the pain and hardship you endured were meant for me to compensate and cherish you. My blood seemed to boil at the thought. Later, when you shielded me from drinking, I was amazed. I always thought you were delicate and pitiable, needing my protection, like when I saved you from Zhao Dongyuan. But when facing someone as intimidating as Eleventh Brother, you showed no fear, toasting him with grace. You don’t know how happy, touched, and proud I felt. Each day, I found myself more and more drawn to you, liking you more. Watching you dance on stage, I was captivated. On the day of the dance-off final, when I found you in the dark backstage, and you softly called out ‘A-Zun’, I knew then that we should be together for life, no matter what happens. Just hearing you call me like that, I would do anything for you. When the lights came on, holding you in front of all those people, I almost blurted out to everyone that you are mine, exclusively mine, and no one else should even think of looking at you. From that moment, you had completely captured my heart. Seeing you smile, I couldn’t help but smile; seeing you sad, my own excitement would turn gloomy. Doing anything for you, whether you knew it or not, filled my heart with simple joy, even making my hands tremble with excitement. When I bask in the sun, thinking of you, a faint, sweet, indescribably wonderful feeling spreads from my bones, through my muscles, gradually filling my entire being, making this world truly beautiful! So, do you understand? When I watch you react to someone who has hurt you so deeply, with just a word or a look, causing your emotions to fluctuate, it feels like thousands of tiny insects are gnawing at my chest. Every breath I take brings a pang of pain. I can help you slowly accept me, but I can’t bear the thought of you still holding him in your heart. I thought I could, but Xiaotang, I’m human, not a god. Seeing you devastated by Song Li’s announcement of his wedding date, my heart felt like it was steeped in bitter medicine. I know you were upset, which is why you kept talking to me on the way back. I couldn’t control myself, not knowing how to erase him from your mind. So, I impulsively kissed you like an immature boy, as if by holding you tight, I could prove you’re mine. When you struggled, I suddenly realized my actions might hurt you, and I was in a panic, even feeling ashamed. My mind was in chaos then, thinking we both needed some time to cool off. I deliberately stayed out for a long time, thinking of you every moment, but when I saw you the next day, I pretended to be indifferent, wanting to see if you cared about me even a tenth as much as I cared for you. But seeing your cautious, bewildered helplessness, I had to restrain myself from rushing to embrace you. When you misunderstood why I was angry, I was furious. You should know me a bit by now, if you’d just put a little thought into it, you’d realize I wasn’t angry because you rejected me; it was out of jealousy, sadness, and fear.”
I envy that man, even now, who still has such a powerful influence. I’m heartbroken that my wholehearted devotion to you still causes you such pain. I’m scared; I’m not even sure if you might impulsively go back to him after being provoked. So, I end up saying hurtful things that I can’t control, and heaven knows how much I regret it when I see you crying. Later, when Dorris called to tell me you had fainted, I was utterly frantic. If anything happened to you because of this, I wouldn’t know what I would do. When I rushed to Tangli, when I saw you lying silently on the bed, when I saw the terrifying wounds on your hands, I truly hated myself for hurting you like this despite loving you so much.
Fu Xiaotang lay in Fang Junxi’s arms, quietly listening to him speak. Her heart felt like dough fermenting in milk, soft, with a sweet and beautiful joy and emotion. But when she heard this, she suddenly looked up in disbelief. Fang Junxi smiled slightly and said, “Surprised? I haven’t solemnly told you this before, so let me say it now.” He paused, one arm holding her, the other gently lifting her chin, sincerely, earnestly, and passionately whispering, “Fu Xiaotang, I love you!”
