Dealing with Tigers

On the windowsill, there’s a Rosemary, under the night sky, as beautiful as a fairy tale, but not as enduring as the Nightingale who gave her life for love. The branches delve into the heart, drawing all its blood to color a Rosemary with such allure. Unfortunately, fate plays its tricks. A story of deep love is a hopeless romance, only to empathize with each other’s suffering. Loving someone for a lifetime shouldn’t be hard, especially for me, loving someone who has become the past. Looking at that dazzling red, I couldn’t help but ask again, “Is it natural?” How could there be an answer? This afternoon, on the damp street, I asked the same, holding it, with hostility? The florist looked puzzled, and I quickly put on a smile, “I want it.” Yes, it should be hostility; I felt the hate. The princess wants it, and the boy must bring it to invite the princess to dance. But where to find a blooming, vibrant Rosemary in this season? Such trouble, the boy frowns in worry… Unconsciously, I started plucking its petals one by one. When I looked at the bare tip, a fleeting sense of satisfaction crossed my mind, and I smiled inexplicably. When will this real world allow me to take revenge? My hand lightly caresses my belly. When will I feel your mischief, Er Yu? Er Yu, what a good name, colorless. When you grow up, you can decide for yourself. Not like me, Liu Yixia, green. But I adore green. My family once locked me in a room, hypnotized me, and subjected me to psychological tests and treatments because they said I was abnormal. How amusing. The doctor said everyone belongs to a color spectrum, and I, to green. Longing for peace, tranquility, contradiction, and also intensity and madness. I indulge in my own world, free from worldly strife. Unwilling to accept change, forever living in past memories and fantasies. Mostly, it’s the artist’s ending. I asked, “Is it very poor?” The doctor laughed, “It varies from person to person. When you grow up, come find me.” I agreed. But as I grew up, I decided not to seek him out. Er Yu, you must, must be free.

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