I coughed, “Hey, you there, come here.” The janitor ran over, “What can I do for you?” “Where’s my Jade Emperor godfather?” I asked. The janitor thought for a moment, “His Majesty should be in the study.” “Then take me to him!” I commanded, and the janitor led me to the Jade Emperor’s study.
I kicked the door open without hesitation, “Godfather! Where’s my 150,000 taels of gold?!” I saw my godfather stuffing silver into a box. “Oh! Godfather, you’re naughty, hiding private money… umm…” Before I could finish, he covered my mouth, “Shh! Quiet! It’ll kill you!” I nodded confusedly.
The Jade Emperor released his hand, “Collecting debt?”
I nodded, “Yes, give me as much as you have.” He covered the box and pushed it under the bed, dusting his hands, “You can have as much as you want. It’s not just 150,000 taels of gold; you might not even be able to carry it.”
I considered, “I’ll take 100,000 taels of gold first.” Without a word, he stuffed a piggy bank into my arms, “There’s 100,000 taels of gold inside. Take it and use it!” “Thanks, godfather!” I kissed his face hard and bounced away.
Just outside the door, I saw the Old Man of the Moon walking towards me. I waved, “Hey, Old Man! Come here!” His face turned black as ink, “Foolish girl! I’m not the Old Man of the Day; I’m the Old Man of the Moon!” I picked my nose dramatically, “What’s in a name? Why are you so sensitive?”
“Hmph!” The Old Man turned away, hands on hips. “What do you want?” I pouted, “Spit it out!” He cursed! “Hey, watch your language! Disrespecting the elderly!”
I asked directly, “Who are my four husbands in this life?” The Old Man suddenly changed his expression, laughing, “Very easy to find. Those four young men were the four emperors at the time. Handsome, upright, wealthy, loyal…”
My face turned pig-liver color, “Are you an idiot?! Emperors have three thousand concubines; how can they be loyal?! You…” I punched the Old Man of the Moon, sending him flying with a diminishing scream. “Useless old man, don’t know how to do anything!”
Hmph! ╭(╯^╰)╮”
