He didn’t understand how passionate promises could turn into being lured into a world of pleasure, ridden by countless men. Once in this world, he could never escape. His impure body had been used so many times that he lost the right to seek happiness.
Thinking of others was useless. He couldn’t show it, could only remain indifferent, putting on a smile to do what a brothel keeper must do. Not wanting to be hurt again, he didn’t want to see disgust in that person’s eyes. He could only silently look from afar, hopelessly guarding his memories, always alone in cold isolation.
He had long wanted to end his life but met her when deciding to die, being saved from a fire. Because of her, he wanted to continue living, enduring any suffering, his heart eroded by despair and desolation.
“Young master,” Fei Er heard Ning Chi’s suppressed sobs and gently nudged him, wanting him to come to his senses.
Ning Chi looked up, brushing his hair behind his ear, tears rolling down his face. He smiled wearily, “Fei Er, no guests will come this time. Let’s rest well and gather our strength. Next year will be busy.” The big master had left, but he felt the master would return, at least to see him. He would continue as Smoke Flower Drunk’s brothel keeper, making it profitable for the Jin family.
But why did she leave? Leaving him in despair, too exhausted to continue living?
Jin Mo stood alone under a tree, the place where he once met Xiao Lian. Looking beyond the courtyard, his gaze distant, he wondered how Xu Yi was doing.
Xiao Lian clung to Jin Yu, unwilling to leave. Su Xi looked flustered at Jin Yu, who nodded to reassure him. Jin Yu carried Xiao Lian to the room before leaving.
Xiao Lian, surrounded by loneliness, opened his tear-filled eyes. Though he wanted things to remain as they were, he couldn’t endure the pain forever. He buried his head in the bedding, sobbing softly. Pretending not to care was truly unbearable.
#
On New Year’s Eve, snow began to fall, brightening the night sky.
Yun Mei applied a light layer of makeup and, seeing Xiao Lian, smiled, “Why are you alone here? It’s cold outside; come inside.”
