“We just ate together. Your old sister is here too.” Jia Wei wiped sweat for Su Mu, “You’re not going home, how will you explain to your old sister?”
“I discussed treatment with her, and I can only return tomorrow.”
Jia Wei looked at Su Mu’s complexion, feeling uneasy, “Is something wrong? Don’t eat anymore.”
“The illness started like this. It’s normal. From a pathological response perspective, the current data shows no problems. Besides, even if I stop medication, it would still be like this.”
Jia Wei noticed Su Ke had been standing by the bed, seemingly wanting to help Su Mu. This summer said, “You go sleep, I’ll watch him tonight.”
Su Ke persistently advised against leaving, Su Mu smiled weakly, without much strength to speak.
Jia Wei dimmed the lights, put on a CD with soft music, turning the volume to the lowest, as if the music was floating in the quiet room, like falling leaves in flowing water.
Su Mu’s breathing sounded painful, but he still tried to say, “This is <Black Star Period>, do you like this music? Actually, it sounds good, not as desperate as expected.”
Jia Wei raised his hand to look: “When I was young, I always looked at five fingers, looking and thinking, why am I a person? Why not a grass? Doing grass would be good, not needing a house, not wearing clothes, not having a belly, just needing sunlight and rain to live freely.”
Su Mu was silent for a long time, his eyes closed, sweat beading in the light, his hair slightly damp. He wasn’t sleeping, but remembering something.
He said, “When I was young, my father often was cold. Dad told me to think about why I wasn’t good-hearted, mom said my bad temper was from my father. They were always politically fighting, like someone accusing, someone representing justice. Once, mom took me to Taiwan, not reconciling with dad. Dad wanted her to join the party, he was righteous. Then dad raised his hand to hit her.”
Su Mu opened his eyes, slowly raising his hand as if placing it on his head, “Like this, pressing my head, my father said, I would dare to rise, he would make my brain burst on the spot.”
Jia Wei silently covered him with a blanket. Su Mu looked at him, “Why do you always think I’m pitiful?”
Jia Wei said, “I’ve long not felt that.”
“This world is not real at all. When waking up, I often feel that this world will have a day unrelated to me, as if I never existed. This feeling might be fear. But not in recent years. Those experimental animals die every day, right up to a second before death, they still think they can live. I look and my heart dies.
You have no desire for anything, so why would you be like this? You are not like me; I hope to get more. Living through this process, some things we can go left or right, some things we cannot go left or right, such as life, which can only be slightly prolonged, and living for a long time is impossible. Life exists in reverse, and once today passes, it will be gone forever. Although there is tomorrow, it is extremely limited. Who knows how many tomorrows one has in a lifetime?
“I used to be afraid, because I still wanted to grasp something, something I couldn’t let go of. Now I don’t have that anymore, and I’m very afraid of this gray, numb feeling. Do you understand? I haven’t even left my old mother by my side.”
“You have never loved her.”
“What is love? How can one define love? I really don’t know, I don’t even know how to be a husband. I have no talent, and no suitable object. Perhaps I won’t be a father in the future. Thinking about my child, I feel desperate. I don’t know why I brought him into this world, don’t know how to tell him why he’s living. I have no confidence that he will feel happy throughout his life.” He stretched out his hand, palm facing up, as if trying to catch something, or holding onto something. His fingers were slender, the light falling on his palm, changing his skin tone. “You think, a child is a life, will cry, will laugh, with dreams of life. What will you give him?”
“I don’t think that way. I want my child to know that you, old man, have gone through hardships for him, and you have also suffered hardships for your child to have a good life. Looking back, it’s both beautiful and sad. People say that what you leave behind, the child is what we bring to this world in an instant.”
Su Se laughed, but seemed more anxious.
After Jia Dao went to wash up and returned, Su Se had already fallen asleep.
Su Se did not sleep soundly that night, waking up several times in panic, and only gradually calming down after a long time.
Jia Dao looked at his dark silhouette, tears welling up in his eyes, then quietly falling in the night. The pale moonlight hung on his body, floating in the water.
Zhou Moucheng entered quickly. Soon, Jia Dao knew that the funds had arrived in position. Zhou Moucheng was very excited; he originally wanted to establish a local foundation, but this time the project far exceeded four hundred million in requirements, so he decided to upgrade the foundation to a national scale. Thus, he moved to contact units in Beijing.
Jia Dao went with him.
With the foundation committee’s chairmanship, Jia Dao began contacting those old Beijing industry relationships again. For the foundation’s investors, Jia Dao was very curious, asking Zhou Moucheng about the organization.
Zhou Moucheng said vaguely that the company had international investment background, and the old board member was responsible for domestic business. He mentioned discussing with Xiao Nuo about joining the foundation, and the old board member quickly agreed to cooperate.
Jia Dao felt uneasy, hoping Zhou Moucheng would arrange his meeting with investors earlier, and Zhou Moucheng responded.
Various business certificates, tax registration, bank account certificates, organizational code certificates, and foreign investment enterprise approval documents were all prepared. Jia Dao specially found a lawyer’s firm to review, and the investors had no problems.
The foundation would later have an absolutely stable poverty alleviation project, with investors mostly eyeing that piece of fat.
On the day of meeting investors, he arranged the venue at a familiar wine shop. This wine shop was located in the Gulou District, producing red wine from the Bordeaux wine region. Using a wine master’s professional terminology, it means: wine body is thick and solid, structure is tight, balance is good, and the tail is long.
He was also good at arranging the wine.
Halfway through the wine, Xia Tian clarified: Zhou Moucheng is a little Su director, Xiao Nuo is a little Su old man, he himself is a little Su colleague. Adding the little Nuo who is truly the emperor’s son, sitting together this month, isn’t there a reason? Zhou Moucheng even found a North story, which was also a little Su’s story, now it’s bank credit.
The personnel of the Bailuo Company were sighing.
The newly established committee had not yet purchased office supplies, and Bailuo had the idle vehicles from Beijing transported to Mingshi. The logistics costs were not low, and there was no significant difference from buying new ones locally. Zhu Zhan could only reluctantly arrange for transportation from Beijing, and he could bring it along this summer.
