Matriarchal Desires

Remembering how he had clung to her shoulder and moaned last night, his face turned pale. Had he done something inappropriate? Would she think he was lewd? Tears filled his eyes as he trembled, helplessly allowing Jing Yu to kiss him, feeling panicked. How could he have acted so thoughtlessly? Hadn’t he promised himself to behave?

Sensing Su Xi’s distress, Jing Yu stopped and kissed his forehead. “It’s okay.”

Su Xi lay on the bed, humming softly, lowering his eyes as tears dampened his long eyelashes, delicate as butterfly wings.

Jing Yu casually picked up a piece of clothing and draped it over herself, taking out a wooden hairpin and holding it out to him. “If you like it, keep it.”

Raising his eyes, he saw a simple yet elegant wooden hairpin with smooth, flowing lines.

He looked at Jin Yu in confusion, softly asking, “For me?”

Jin Yu nodded slightly, “Yes, for you. Do you like it?”

Su Xi’s eyes reddened as tears fell. He took the wooden hairpin, his heart filled with happiness. He had admired this hairpin while helping Jin Yu undress and had felt dejected, wondering which man she would give it to, never expecting it would be him.

Jin Yu helped him sit up, leaning him against her chest. “Let me tie up your hair.”

Su Xi blushed, shyly nodding, “Okay.”

With his consent, Jin Yu took the hairpin and gently gathered his soft hair, securing it while leaving a long strand hanging down. She twirled the strand between her fingers. “It’s done. I think it suits you well.”

This hairpin was one she had carved during her leisure time, realizing only later how perfect it was for Su Xi. Now, with the hairpin holding his hair, it looked even better than she had imagined. Jin Yu smiled softly, feeling she had made the right choice in giving it to him.

Su Xi slightly lowered his eyes, his long eyelashes trembling, the blush rising on his face.

Tears welled up in his eyes, which he wiped away before embracing Jin Yu’s waist and burying his head in her shoulder. “Thank you.” His choked voice was filled with emotion and happiness.

Jin Yu understood and stroked his back comfortingly. Although she occasionally ignored Su Xi, she was aware of the hardships he had faced over the years.

After a while, Su Xi realized his vulnerability and quickly wiped his tears. Remembering how he had thrown himself into her arms, he blushed, lowering his head shyly. After hesitating, he looked up and softly asked Jin Yu, “Again?”

Su Xi was unaware of Jin Yu’s thoughts. When he heard her words, he hurriedly shook his head, grabbing her arm. “No, I haven’t taken on any other clients…” But he suddenly choked up, unable to continue. He worried about how she would perceive him if he revealed his hidden life as a prostitute, wanting only to enter the Jin family’s world.

He trembled slightly, his gaze evasive, avoiding Jin Yu’s eyes and looking anxious.

Jin Yu furrowed her brow slightly. He was lying, deceiving her; his eyes were panicked, dodging her gaze. There must be a client visiting tonight.

After their intimacy last night, how could he be with another woman tonight? This thought pained her. She flipped over, pressing her body onto Su Xi’s and lowering her head to kiss his lips.

Although Su Xi was not proactive in sexual matters, after two years with Jin Yu, he knew what she might do next. He slightly parted his lips, waiting for her deeper kiss.

Seeing this, Jin Yu felt a surge of anger, presuming he must be skilled with other women. She thrust her tongue in, teasingly intertwining with his. Initially angry, the kiss became more lingering, their cheeks rubbing intimately.

Despite their two years of intimacy, Su Xi remained inexperienced. Although Jin Yu felt blocked emotionally, she pressed gently against him, aware that he was still tired. Seeing his awkwardness softened her anger, and she became gentler in her kisses.

After a while, Jin Yu released him, caressing his flushed cheeks and brushing away damp strands of hair. She placed a tender kiss on his blushing cheeks, looking into his hazy eyes, and said, “I’ll come over tonight.”

Even if you have a client tonight, I’ll make her leave.

Su Xi mumbled an affirmative sound in a daze. Jin Yu, satisfied, released him and kissed his forehead before picking up her scattered clothes to dress.

The rustling of clothing made Su Xi blush and turn away, not daring to look at Jin Yu. Although they had touched intimately before, this was the first time he was awake with her beside him, making his heart race.

Jin Yu got out of bed, tidied her clothes, and put on her cloak. The swish of her clothing’s hem resonated in the room, making Su Xi’s heart tremble.

After placing another kiss on Su Xi’s blushing face, she ignored the embroidered pillow that had fallen to the floor and walked out.

#

The autumn wind was cold, blowing sharply as Jin Yu stepped outside. Despite being warmly dressed, she still felt the chill.

It was bright now. Xiao Lian was carrying a small bucket of water to the kitchen, his hands frozen red. Seeing Jin Yu, he quickly put down the bucket and gave her a complex look before running into the house.

Jin Yu sighed helplessly, brushed her sleeve, and left as usual.

#

The tent was still warm, and the blush had not faded from Su Xi’s face. A few strands of hair were damp against his cheeks as he lay in the soft bedding, his hair scattered on the pillow, still holding the clothes loosely.

He loosened his clothes and picked up the wooden hairpin that had slipped from his hair onto the pillow, examining it carefully. A sweet smile spread across his face. He had always wanted to look at this wooden hairpin closely, and today she had actually given it to him—something he never dared to imagine.

Suddenly, one side of the bed curtain was lifted. “Brother, she’s gone. Are you okay?”

Su Xi was startled by the sound, the wooden hairpin slipping from his hand. He quickly picked it up, meeting Xiao Lian’s worried face and shaking his head. “I’m fine, Xiao Lian. Don’t worry.”

“I don’t believe you,” Xiao Lian said. After how loudly he cried out last night, how could he be fine? He must be saying this to avoid worrying him.

“I really am fine,” Su Xi insisted.

Xiao Lian furrowed his brow, leaning over to lift the bedding and gasped. As usual, it was covered in bruises and bite marks. How could he possibly be fine? He looked at Su Xi, whose face was still flushed.

Su Xi blushed, shivering from the cold. He quickly pulled the bedding over himself. “Xiao Lian, don’t worry. I’m really okay.” At this moment, he didn’t know how to explain it to Xiao Lian.

“You’re not okay at all,” Xiao Lian’s eyes reddened. He sat at the bed’s edge, holding Su Xi’s wrist. “If you’re in pain, I won’t let her in the door again.”

“Xiao Lian!”

Xiao Lian turned away, aggrieved.

“I just don’t want her to hurt you anymore.”

Sighing, Su Xi clasped Xiao Lian’s hand, his expression softening. “I know you care about me. But Xiao Lian, she was the one who saved you, saved us.”

“I know,” Xiao Lian lowered his head.

“Do you remember how you used to faint, and how she carried you to the medical hall? The first time I received a client was because of your illness. Despite my efforts, your condition didn’t improve, and out of despair, she sent someone to treat you. She was just a one-night benefactor, yet she continued to help us, risking her reputation as the master of the Jin family by associating with a male prostitute. How could I not be touched?”

Xiao Lian lowered his head, guilty. Although grateful, he grumbled, “Even so, she can’t keep torturing your body. It’s been two years.”

Su Xi gripped the wooden hairpin, feeling happy. “Xiao Lian, you still don’t understand. For me, it isn’t torture but a blessing, something I’m willing to do. She has helped us so much; what could I give her besides my body?”

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