After walking several dozen meters, she dared not go further. The house behind the white wall was where she had lived for five years. That tightly shut black window was where she used to look out at the distant mountains and sea, imagining herself as a bird, flying freely to perch on branches or rooftops, free to go anywhere. Humans are strange; once free, they yearn for captivity again. She remembered how in the days before leaving, she often recalled that window, standing on the sill with Yu Qian unexpectedly embracing her from behind, nibbling at her neck. She protested, calling him a bone-chewer, but he bit harder, saying, “You’re just pretending to scold me. I treat you like a juicy corn cob.” Her neck felt hot, and though she laughed, tears fell.
She walked, wiping her tears with the back of her hand, but they wouldn’t stop, flowing freely. Distracted by her thoughts, she bumped into a tree trunk, rubbing her forehead while thinking, “I deserve this, he’s about to get engaged, and I’m still thinking of him.” Squatting on the ground, the pain at least stopped her tears. Then, a pair of shoes appeared before her. Her heart tightened; the place was so quiet, what if there were bad people? She stood up quickly, not looking, ready to run, but her hand was grabbed. Just as she was about to scream, she was rudely dragged towards the road. Then she saw clearly – she couldn’t help but call out, “Yu Qian!”
Zhou Yuqian didn’t respond or look at her, just dragged her to the car, shoved her in, and took the driver’s seat. The silence continued inside the car. Lai Hui felt like she was dreaming again, willingly yet with complex emotions, she sat properly, hands folded neatly on her lap, not daring to wake from the dream or snap back to reality. She didn’t even dare to turn her face, fearing to see him or see him too clearly, thus missing the look of iron resolve mixed with loneliness on Zhou Yuqian’s face.
The car headed back into the city, then turned towards the eastern suburbs. About an hour later, it stopped in front of a large black gate. Yu Qian’s voice was harsh as he said, “Get out!” She obeyed, not doubting if she had been conditioned by him over five years to follow his commands reflexively.
They walked up a spiral stone staircase, her steps on the bluestone slabs, looking out at the lake, its surface shimmering with the wind, and cherry trees under the lights, snowflakes falling gently. The leaves, narrow and long, swayed in the wind, likely irises, not yet in bloom this season. She saw the home she had once described, nestled against mountains and by the water, hearing the sound of pines and bamboo, a place both romantic and serene. She watched Yu Qian, his face cold, a slight, mocking smile at the corner of his lips, tinged with a bit of sorrow or bitterness, or so she thought.
He didn’t want to talk, nor did he look at her, just pulled her forward to a traditional Japanese house, pushing open the door to the room where he and Jia Yi had once negotiated. The bamboo blinds were up, and only two lamps along the wall were lit, casting a dim, candle-like light in the room. Yu Qian sat cross-legged by the window, a tea set on the table but no tea. He tapped the table a few times and said, “Sit!” She sat opposite him, her hands on the table, supporting her unsteady body.
Yu Qian, looking out at the lights by the lake, said, “This house is for my future son.” Lai Hui felt a pang in her heart, thinking, “I’m already in pain, and he still needs to stab at it?” She retorted stiffly, “Why tell me this? To celebrate your happiness?”
Yu Qian let out a cold laugh, grabbed her hand, and roughly pulled off her ring, saying, “Celebrate? Yes, I should congratulate you. My future son is engaged to someone else! That’s what I should do, but I can’t say it.”
Lai Hui, initially confused, opened her eyes wide after a moment’s thought. Yu Qian put the ring back on her finger, not looking at her teary eyes, and continued, “Do you remember what day it is today? Our contract ends, and I thought we should establish a new contract today, one that’s legal, voluntary, and equal. I thought you would be willing.”
He finally looked into her eyes, staring intensely without blinking, and said, “But it seems your first love still wins, just because you loved him before, you choose to marry him; just because I forced you to be mine, nothing I do counts?” His voice was filled with bitterness, his temples throbbing with anger.
Lai Hui was left speechless by his accusations. After a long pause, she withdrew her hand and loudly said, “Is this how you talk about Wei Ping? You’re about to get engaged, and now you’re talking about a new contract? Our contract was legal, what about yours with her, isn’t it?”
She thought of the heart-wrenching pain she felt every time she watched those news reports in those few days. She tried her best to control herself, to muster some dignity, knowing that reason was on her side, yet her vision was blurred by tears, weakening her resolve. “The phone wouldn’t connect, no news at all. When I was sick, I called for you, but what about you? You were out there with someone else, and when I got better, you said you were going to get engaged. You didn’t know how dead I felt back then, and you said, you you—” Yu Qian’s heart softened a bit seeing her tears. The longing accumulated over the past month had all gathered together, thinking he would see her, propose to her, only to hear she was engaged to Xie Jiayi. His pride couldn’t bear it, and he initially thought to just let it go, to bless her choice. However, seeing her squatting on the street like an abandoned cat, he realized he had overestimated his own capacity for tolerance. How could he swallow this? She was clearly his, and it was evident she loved him. Who knew that after just a month apart, she would choose someone else? If something unexpected happened to him later, wouldn’t she remarry immediately? With these thoughts, his heart hardened again, and he said coldly, “There were reasons I was out of touch, and you believe those gossip news? Don’t you use your brain to think that the person I said I was going to get engaged to was you? But you, you went back to your old flame, didn’t you? You should just go with him—”
“Bang, bang, bang,” a few loud knocks on the table with a teacup by Lai Hui interrupted his harsh words. After he stopped, she shouted back, “All you can do is talk! Have you ever thought about your precious fiancée? What am I? Just a nobody compared to her, right? She’s the one you truly want, don’t blame me for this. If you’re afraid I’ll cling to you, just say so. If you think my existence will ruin your great marriage, say so! Anyway, I’m leaving, I won’t bother you anymore. No one will know you had someone like me, someone you couldn’t show off!”
“You were the first to get engaged to someone else, and you didn’t wait for me to come back, and now you’re raising your voice? If it’s not mine, you don’t care at all, right? Fine, go live your happy life, go wherever you want, just make sure you don’t delay my marriage, I don’t need to waste my efforts on you!”
